म जसरी म हुँ! (The way I Am, Me.)

म जसरी, म हुँ ! 

बारम्बार अनि बारम्बार 

पटक, पटक 

भविष्यले ठगेको मनुवा म

मलाई वर्तमानको भुतले, भगवान मान्छ 

आँफुले आँफुलाई त, चिन्न खोज्दा नचिने जस्तो गरेर 

भुतसँग साइनो गाँस्न खोज्ने, म मनुवालाई 

भुत र भविष्य बीचको बिजेताको खोजी छ 

भविष्यलाई बारम्बार, पटक पटक 

माया गर्न खोज्दा पनि,

भुतको गल्तीहरुलाई भगवान मानेर अपनाउन खोज्दा पनि,

जहिल्यै, भरपर्दो मानिसहरु प्रतिको विश्वासले नै वर्तमानको डुङ्गा चलाउन खोज्दा पनि,

जीवन नै उथलपुथल, त्यो भयङ्कर बाढीले, मेरो भुत, वर्तमान र भविष्य, सबै डुबायो। 

 

पौडन मात्र पनि, पाएको भए 

बिजेताको को हो, मेसो पाएको भए

म जसरी म हुँ,  हुन पाएको भए

डुबेर पनि म, बाँच्ने थिएँ, जस्तो लाग्छ। 

Based on a true story 

- BY D.Rz

English Translation 

The way I Am, Me

Again, and again —

Time after time.

I, the human deceived by the future...

Find myself worshipped as a god —

by the ghost of the present.

When I try to know myself,

I fail — as if I’m a stranger to my own reflection.

I, who tries to bond with the ghosts of the past,

am in search of a victor —

between the past and the future.

Even when I try, again and again,

to love the future,

Even when I try to accept

the mistakes of the past as divine lessons,

Even when I place my faith

in the reliable people steering

the boat of the present —

Life turns turbulent.

That terrifying flood

has drowned my past, my present, and my future.

If only I had learned to swim…

If only I had found

who the true victor was…

If only I had been allowed

to be as I truly am —

I feel…

even drowning,

I would have lived.